"Oh....no...."

"Congratulations.  That's the fifth alarm clock you've broken in a month!"  Donatello tapped his foot in the doorway of the bedroom.  "It's not easy finding new ones, down here, you know."

"It wasn't my intention to do that, Don."

"Right.  Better get up anyway.  It's unlike you to sleep in this late."

Late?  Leonardo looked around to see what time it was, realizing he just destroyed the clock radio.  Well, looked as though the 9 was closest to the left and the other two numbers had a four and a five.  Either it was a quarter to ten in the morning, or, he slept in real late!

The smell of bacon brought him to their drilled-out hole of a kitchen.  Michaelangelo was dodging hot spit from the little strips of pig meat he cooked in a large skillet.  Raphael sat at the small table with an electronic hand-held game making all weird beeps and musical sounds.

"Well, look who finally decided to revive himself!"

"Hey, Leo!  Hungry?"

"A little."  Leonardo sat down across from Raphael.  He paused his game and leaned inward.

"A hell of a battle?"

"One of the worst yet, Raph.  I can't believe how the drug and alcohol level has increased on the streets.  We've never worked over time such as this."

"It's not over."  Donatello entered with a rolled-up newspaper.  "2 more busts were found this morning over on the west side of town near Queens. Reports read that they found sedatives were being used in elementary schools to calm the children down."

"And you thought gun control was bad."  Raphael groaned.  "Little 8 year olds carrying knives to school is your everyday news."

Don looked to the paper again.  "That section is on the next page."

"Figures."

The breakfast was good and so was the burn-off calorie workout.  Leonardo dodged and kicked, getting worse off at his hits than his misses.

"Leo!  If I had a gun, I would have shot you dead by now!  That was one of the weakest kicks I've ever-"

Leo threw a left hook out of nowhere, sending Raph flat on the mat.

"When you talk, you lose."  Leo paused to see Mike and Don staring at him, blinking.  "Is there a problem?"

"There will be."  Michaelangelo bowed and stepped away as Splinter approached Leo.

"Come with me, Leonardo."

The two sat across from one another in Splinter's room.  A light fragrance of Jasmine incense smoked in a corner by a lamp made of rice.  Splinter had the word, 'concerned' written on his face.  Leo could see this clearly and thought it best to keep his mind fresh of negative thoughts.

"Have I done something wrong, master?"

"Wrong?  No, Leonardo.  But, your performance in the dojo is what concerns me the most.  I fear you are lacking in strength when you battle.  It worries me deeply when you also have lack in sleep.  Do you wish to tell me what it is that is troubling you?"

Leonardo leaned back, releasing a heavy sigh.

"Drugs, alcohol, violence...the troubles of the outside world, sensei.  I guess I worry myself over other people's problems.  All that talk really gets to me. "

"Ah.  People's problems."  Splinter pointed to him.  "That is your weakness, my son.  When you take the pain of sorrow and anger from the world above and place that burden on to your shoulders, you can not achieve the goals that you so choose to succeed in.  Goals such as in your skills, vitality, and wisdom."

"What can I do to keep my mind focused on my training?  I want to help others as a crime fighter but I also need to help myself in my own practice."

"That is it."  Splinter raised a finger.  "Help yourself to keep in body and soul of what it is you work on.  Allow your senses to flow in harmony. Take in what you see and hear and do not worry over what you can not prevent from occurring."  Both took a breath, closing their eyes.  Minutes passed.  Splinter looked to Leo, smiling.  "The pressures have ceased in you.  You may go now."

"Thank you, master."

Leonardo bowed and was excused for the remainder of the day.  The morning brought a gorgeous ray of sunshine at the crack of dawn.  It was going to be a scorcher today.  People were just getting ready for work by putting on their monkey suits or zipping up floral-pattern dresses. Down below the city, the sewer system was cold, dark, and wet.  Allow your senses to flow in harmony.  Fine words to follow and go by from a skilled, ninja rat.  Leo slowly sloshed along the muddy waters of the sewers.  The air was cool but rank to the nose.

The sound of talking seemed to echo on the other side. A group of teens not wanting to attend class were resting near a manhole ladder, puffing away on what Leo detected as pot and other foul stenches.  The smell filled his nostrils, giving him a light buzz of an effect.  Remembering he was the do-gooder, it was time to crash the party.  Somehow.

"Hey, look Nails.  Am I tripping or do I see an alligator standing upright?"

Another teen looked over slowly.  "Nah.  That's no alligator.  That's a turtle!  See it's shell?"

"You are trespassing here."  Leonardo told them gravely.  "I suggest you take your business elsewhere and leave this place, now."

The first teen moved away from the wall and approached Leo with a quick size-up.

"You looking for trouble, turtle-freak?  Cuz that's what it looks like to me."  The two were almost neck and neck with each other.

"Stop it, Blade."  A girl suddenly intervened.  Nails?  Blade?  Didn't these kids have normal names?  Leonardo looked to the girl.  She appeared high school age, dressed in black leather of course, different colored strands in her hair and her red, bloodshot eyes were the dead giveaway that she was definitely on something.  Leo could tell she was scared after glancing to his weapons.  "He was only kidding, um, turtle.  We were just leaving here anyway."

"I wasn't kidding.  I meant every damn word of it."  Blade stepped closer, his stench making Leo nauseous.

"Get out of my face."  Leonardo growled to him.

Blade threw a weak push that Leo easily dodged.  In the turn, he did a side kick, knocking him on the hard concrete.  The others backed away as Leo prepared himself to battle mode.  Blade carefully stood up and this time threw a punch, missing pitifully.  Leo didn't even have to move that time.

"Go, home, 'Blade.'  Before you hurt yourself."  Leonardo glanced up to hear the other kids giggle.

"I will not stand for that, man!"

"Dude, you can hardly stand at all!"  One of the teens laughed to him.  "Let's just go and leave this weird guy alone."

"I got 'im-"

An arm came from behind Leo, wrapping his neck in a tight squeeze.  Leo gasped and immediately clutched on to his wrist, attempting to seize the attacker.  He only clutched tighter.  Leonardo choked and wheezed in a panic, seeing the others watching with morbid curiosity.

"Get him Cal, get him!"

Cal?  How many kids were there?

Leonardo eyed around.  Looked like a good handful of delinquents.  With a grunt, Leo backed into a wall, hearing an 'oof!' behind him.  Cal leapt on to his shell next, keeping his arm where it was.  Directly at the vocal chords.  Leo felt something dropped down his throat, something that the kid was holding.  He gasped and choked before feeling it slide down, almost burning his neck.

"Cal, you're hurting him!  Stop it!"  The girl shrilled.

Leonardo backed into the wall again, this time with more force.  Cal groaned in pain and loosened his grip.  Big mistake.  Leonardo took his arm and flung his body overhead into the open sewer water hole.  Everyone got quiet and looked to Leo as he bent over on his knees, coughing and holding his throat.

"Hey, man.  He was just playing with you."

Someone spoke up from behind but Leo couldn't see who it was.  A shorter teen, almost his height, emerged.  His eyes were bloodshot and his hair was greasy.

"I don't...."  Leo gagged, tasty a foreign feeling in his mouth.  "I don't play, 'dude.' "

"Then, what do you do?"

Leonardo looked up, breathing heavily.  Something was soon intoxicating his insides.

"I....I don't have to....tell you.....nothing."

"Hey, man.  You all right?  You're not tripping on us are you?"

The faces were starting to look distorted.  Leo blinked, shaking his head.  He could feel his head becoming light, his vision fuzzy.  The walls that surrounded them looked like they were moving.  Breathing along with his breathing patterns.  Suddenly, Splinter's advice entered his mind.

"Allow your senses to flow in harmony.  Take in what you see and hear and do not worry over what you can not prevent from occurring."

What he sees and hears is one thing.  The odor, the smells of the whole area were entering his clear, small nostrils and caving in the passage of fresh air.  Leo's eyes went next, rolling up toward the ceiling.  His knees trembled beneath him.  He could feel himself getting all warm and numb all over.

"Don't you know this stuff can kill you?!  What....the hell.....are you kids doing to yourselves?"

The girl walked over, showing him her little stash of pills and things.  Within it was something he had never seen before.

"He slipped you a window um, turtle."  It looked like a small, square piece of paper.  Leo took it from her and examined it with glazed eyes.  He spent a long time looking it over, almost now falling into her legs.  "Hey."  She was uncertain, but reached down to help him up, taking the paper away from him.  "What are we going to do with him, guys?"  Leo suddenly had a smile to his face, reaching to her in return.

"I...I want to try another."  He slurred to her, grinning like an imp.

"You what?"  The girl took his arms, looking into his face.  "Whoever you are, you are not well!  You were fighting it, fighting us, and saying we were wrong.  And now you're giving in?"

"Hey, I like this guy now!"  Blade said while brushing himself off.  "He's not a party crasher after all."

Leo stared at her.  "Why do I want another, um.....what's your name....another....try...."

"Maddie.  And the reason why is because it's addictive."  She assured him, looking into his face.  "Look, these aren't even mine.  They're from my friend Shelia who has me hold onto them for safe keeping.  She felt pressured into it but she also thought it'd be cool to try it out.  You don't have to do it."

"Maddie, don't change his mind!"  Someone pulled her back, making Leo clutch the ground with his flat palms.  The kid took the paper from Maddie and shoved it in Leo's hand, stepping away.  "You want another?  Knock yourself out, dude."

"On the floor, that is!"  Someone joked.  The others laughed.

Leonardo looked down to the blotted paper, the strain of looking gave him a headache.  He heard whispers of doubt, whispers of him chickening out.  He wasn't a chicken.  But he wasn't stupid either!  He looked up to everyone.  They stood watching him, waiting to see what he'll do next.  Kissing pavement was not what they expected.  The group groaned and Leo could hear them start to leave his presence, mumbling to themselves.

"God, what a whimp!"  "Dumb loser!"  "Dork!"  "I thought he was gonna actually do it!"  "Hey, dude, come back later when you're ready to deal with it!"  Lastly, he felt someone brush his arm.  "Sorry, to get you in this mess, turtle.  You'll be all right when it wears off."

Leonardo turned to lay on his shell, staring straight up to the ceiling, to the several levels of earth, to the street, to the buildings, to the sky above.  He could see what he couldn't see before.  Typical sewer rats were now dancing passed him, dressed in tutus with pink parasols in their little paws.  Bugs looked multicolored and appeared to be crawling in circular motions across the way.  The dirty water that flowed down the passage looked like a river of clouds.  Rippling, changing clouds that rolled by like strong winds.  Images in the clouded water appeared.  Large small images rose and fell whenever Leo blinked at them.

"Help."  He uttered quietly, extending a hand to the water.  "Stop, moving....like that.  Stop that."

Leo turned his head to the nearby ladder.  A parallel set of unmoving steel started to wobble from side to side.  It would bend forwards, backwards, left, right, than began doing jiggly patterns as if it were laughing at him.  Laughing at his weakened state.  The sight of it frightened him deeply.

"Don't....don't laugh at me."

Raising a hand, he stared at it.  His green, two-fingered, one thumb hand.  The fingers flexing and bending.  Then, down on his palm, a pair of eyes appeared to him, blinking and winking rapidly.

"Aaaah!  Noooo!"  Leo flipped onto his stomach, smashing his hand on the pavement.  Lifting it up, the eyes were gone.  "Ohhhh, God!"  Now, on his knees, things started to take normal shape again.  Then twist and bend out of focus.  He glanced around, thinking he saw groups of people coming towards him.  Was it the kids again?  His brothers?  Leo stood to greet whomever it was.  "Please, help.  I feel disoriented-"

The people approached closer, right up to him, then right through him!  Leo stared into lifeless eyes as each person walked by him.  They were dressed in turn-of-the-century attire and carrying luggage with them.  They must have come from a derailed subway train that crashed over a hundred years ago.  A chill ran throughout Leo's body, seeing that these people were not all there.  Faded, transparent souls, that made the whole area cold to the touch.

It was then, he began his long trek back to the lair.  Staggering back, the inky blackness in parts of the sewer showed bright lights of ugly faces staring at him.  Ugly, creatures that looked human crossed with feline or something animal-like.  They pointed in shame as Leo tried not to make eye contact with any of them.  His mind was still full of the drug's power which were playing tricks on his sight.  It troubled him that, because of such a potent drug, could it have an everlasting effect?

"It'll wear off.  It has to.  Or I will kill myself if I have to live like this for the rest of my life.  Have to fight it.  Have to make it home."

Leonardo lost his footing and sloshed down into the sewer water.  Treading that way, he walked on in knee-deep stagnant filth.  His foot bumped into something, causing him to jolt.  It felt hard, but rigid.  Curiosity getting the better of him, he scooped his hand below, catching a foreign object.  It was a human skull, detached of all it's body parts.  It grinned up at him, the sockets almost staring with visible eyes.  It only took Leo two seconds to drop the gruesome thing back into the water where it sunk to the bottom again, back to it's grave.

Leo could see he several yards away a recognizable sewer passage.  He started to tread, then paused, hearing voices all around him.  Coming and going like echoed whispers:  "Whimp.....imp....imp....p...."  "Daaaare to try another...nother...nother...."  "It'll wear off.....fff.....fff...."   "Come back.....ack....ack.....to usssssss......."

"Get away!"  He waved his hands, backing against the wall.  "Stop!!"  Slowly closing his eyes, the last thing he saw was a huge grinning face before he blacked out.

"Leonardo, wake up."

"He's coming to."

"Leo?"

Leonardo opened his eyes, seeing all eyes looking down on him.  "Get away!"  He flung the blanket off along with himself almost falling off the couch.  Mike caught him and held him up.

"Leonardo, thank goodness."  Splinter clutched his chest.

"Master."  Leo went to hug him but paused, seeing his brothers staring at him.  Instead, he leaned into him, bowing.  "Master, what happened?"

"I'd say an episode of X-Files is what happened."  Raphael looked skyward.

"We found you unconscious, my son."

Leonardo groaned, rubbing his eyes.  "I ended up out in unfamiliar territory.  It was because of the....oh, man, Master.  Forgive me, please."

"Forgive you?  Leonardo, you have done nothing wrong.  It is I, who must be forgiven, for I have mislead you."

"No, I shouldn't have strayed from here.  I caused everyone to panic.  That's why I must beg for forgiveness."

"Um, Leo?"  Donatello circled around, staring with concern.  "I must ask you a question.  On a certain matter, in fact."

"On what, Don?"

"On this."  Donatello showed in his palm a tiny piece of paper.  "When we found you, we found this clenched in your hand.  Um, we know how you are about such matters as....ah, well, this.  Would you care to explain where you got it?"

Leo took it with a shaky hand, staring at it as if it were poison.  He knew for a fact that it was a type of poison.  Of the mind.

"It's a window."  He simply stated.  "On my walk, I caught some adolescents in the act.  One of them gave this to me."  Leo swallowed.  "I would never, I mean, as the type of being I am, wouldn't even consider doing...."  Words felt useless to him.

"So, what happened?  It accidentally fell into your mouth?"  Raphael squinted his eyes.  "Is that what happened?"

"Yes, Raph."  He looked to them all.  "It was an accident!   I told you I would never do this....there were too many jerks....one grabbed my neck and shoved it down my throat, thinking I'd enjoy it.  He thought I'd get a thrill out of it."

"Did you?"  Mike suggested.

"Horrible!  It was hell on Earth!"  Leo stood up, knowing he had to be heard.  "How many times do I have to tell you I would never do such a thing?!"

"I know you wouldn't, Leo.  I understand fully."  Donatello tapped his arm, glancing to Splinter.  "But, there's something else you should know."

"What's that?"  Leo looked to Mike and Raph whose expressions were changed to sorrow.  "It won't kill me, will it?"

Donatello stared at Leo, sighing.  "Um, well...."

"Don!  Will it?  Tell me!"  The echo from his shouting lasted a good two seconds.  Donatello raised a finger at him.

"I think you'd better sit back down for this."  Leonardo glared to him before resuming his seat on the couch.  Donatello moved over to the coffee table, sitting across from him.  "Leo, I wouldn't ever hide anything from you or the others, no matter what the circumstances were.  This little window as you called it, or LSD, is a potent drug but is physically safe and non-toxic.  It depends on the person that handles it in different ways then others.  The trip can be extremely horrible as you said it was or it could be very pleasuarble."

"So, what is wrong, then Don?  What should we know?  Is it harmful to us?  Is that what you're trying to say?"

Donatello nodded.  "I'm afraid so, Leo.  Some drugs have a dangerous effect on humans but also have unknown effects on mutants.  Why?  Because it's never been tested on us before.  A mutant had never tried it.  Until now.  Taking trips is one thing LSD does.  But, if the chemicals in LSD are adverse with the mutagen chemicals inside your body, it will result in irreversible consequences."

Leo stared back at Don, feeling incredibly frightened by all this.  He looked to the others again.  Mike looked like he was about to cry.

"So, I am going to die."

Don shook his head but pointed to the paper.  "I'd like to examine it but am not about to test it on any of us.  If you took that second dose, we'd probably be digging an early grave for you right now."

Leo swallowed, feeling himself getting the shivers all over.

"I have cheated death many times, even felt him watching over me during the time of when the drug hit me.  If I had to die, I would want it to be in battle.  Not over a drug effect.  I won't let a little sliver of paper stop me from living."

"You say that now, Leo."  Don said.  "But, your insides would lose their battle and you would die without a fighting chance."

The little paper was not disposed of right away as Splinter wished for.  Instead, Don took it to his lab to have it examined as promised.  For reasons Leo couldn't explain, he decided not to ask after all.

Days later, Leo found himself walking topside with April after she got off work.  He told her his little brush of death with the drug that was no longer considered a secret to the world.

"Acid.  LSD.  You get the idea."

Compared to the many other near-deaths that were more gruesome, it still frightened April to think a small thing like that would take the life of a huge, strong mutant.  On the street, Leo paused at a local high school to see several cars parked in many rows in the lot.  The abbreviation on them: NYPD spelled trouble for a group of teens.  April paused as well to watch several kids being walked out with handcuffs.  Leo recognized the ones he met in the sewer.  They looked no different from a few days ago.  Just as horrible as when he mistakenly ran into them.

"Turtle?"  Leo spun around to stare at Maddie.  Her eyes were still red, only this time they were from tears.  "What are you doing here?"

"Seeing justice getting served."  He watched the kids, then looked to her again.  "Shouldn't you be with that group?"

Maddie shook her head.  "They already questioned me.  I wasn't doing that stuff, um, that you were given.  I was overdosed on painkillers and only got a stern talking to."  She shrugged.  "You were right.  That stuff does kill.  I should have listened to you."

"But, you did listen."  He patted her shoulder.  "You said you didn't do that stuff."

"No, but she did."  Maddie pointed to a parked ambulence.  The paramedics were strapping in a young girl and hoisting the stretcher into the back of the van.  "Shelia was found passed out in the girl's bathroom.  They found the drugs stuffed in her purse.  It was wrong of me to give back what was originally hers.  Should have thrown them away instead."  Leo looked over to the ambulence, then frowned to Maddie.  "I know you don't want to hear my problems, turtle."

"Leo."

"Um, Leo.  But, I wished I listened to you sooner.  To tell her she's killing herself."  Her voice started to break up.  "I was a fool not to listen and now it may be too late for Sheila.  She was my best friend."

Leonardo looked up to April whom was biting her upper lip, her eyes glazing over.  Leo stood watching this girl cry in front of him before reaching over to her.

"Hey, it's okay.  She'll be okay."  Leo lightly tapped her shoulder, then pulled away.  "Um, would you like go somewhere and get coffee?"

"What?  With you?  Um, after what we did to you that day, you want to do that?  With me?"  Maddie looked up to April whom smiled with a nod.  Leo nodded too.

"I held a gruge for one whole day.  But I knew deep down that you were only with them, not actually one of them."

"That's true.  The only reason why I was there was because I ditched my Science class that day."  Leo looked to her sternly.  "We had a test that I wasn't ready to take."  He still stared, smirking unpleasantly.  "But, um, I guess that's a bad thing to do as well, huh?"

"Yeah, I'd say it is."  Don wouldn't be too pleased to know that!  "So, how about that coffee?"

Maddie finally nodded back with a smile.  "Um, okay.  Sure."  Leo brushed his hand across her back as the three started to walk off.  "Tell me something, Leo.  Will I get in trouble for hurting my friend?"

"Trouble?  No, Madeline.  You won't."  He looked to April with half a smile.  "For you see, we were both innocently guilty."

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